HOW TO IMPROVE YOURSELF AND FIND THE RIGHT ENVIRONMENT
While growing up it is cooler to have a lot of friends and being among the most popular ones and to be an expert in the best online casinos. However, when turning older and older one will notice that it is not the quantity that matters but quality. That applies to every sphere of our personal lives. But it is not your friends that define you. But more yourself. So work on yourself and create your character. Never stand still and evolve and learn. Then you will attract the right people. That can be in a friendship or a love relationship.
NECESSITY AND PERSONAL CHOICE
Less is more, because a friendship needs time for intimacy, conversation, honesty and shared experiences.
A person’s desire to have few social relationships is a personal choice. Many believe that a large circle of acquaintances is a sign of success. But an acquaintance is not a friendship and a friendship needs time for intimacy, conversations, honesty and shared experiences.
Being surrounded by many people does not necessarily mean success: you can still feel lonely. Some people also don’t feel the need to maintain many social contacts. You prefer selected friendships that go deep and involve responsibility.
The need for popularity can have negative consequences. In social networks, the number of friendships reflects a person’s reach and popularity. The reality, however, is slightly different: a new study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology shows that too many friends can be detrimental.
In a series of experiments, the authors show that we tend to prefer to be friends with people who have fewer friends than ourselves. The study demonstrated the friendship paradox: we think we’ll make more friends if we’re more popular, but at the same time we’re more interested in making friends when we know they are in a small friendship group.
THE FRIENDSHIP PARADOX
Social ties are obviously important. As the authors of the study write, they are the building blocks of our society. More of these connections mean greater social value and, in many cases, more resources. It is therefore reasonable to assume that we prefer to make friends with those who have many friends. However, social relationships are only useful if they are mutual. This, in turn, is a reason for favoring fewer friends.
Friendship comes with certain obligations and expectations. People with many friends may not be able to meet those commitments, so the quality of the relationship suffers. If you have too many friends, you can’t be a true friend, so others are less interested in befriending you. Keep in mind: You don’t have to prove your social worth.
You’re not an influencer, so you don’t need to prove your social worth based on the number of friendships you have. There are times when you have fewer or more friends, but that says nothing about you or your worth. If you feel a constant need for validation, you should look into the underlying causes.
Friends can also be a distraction strategy that keeps you from taking care of yourself or introspecting. If trauma is hiding behind it, you should seek professional help. Do not be ashamed if you ask for help. It is perfectly fine and even better that you notice yourself that you need and more importantly want help.
THE ROLE OF SELF-ESTEEM
First of all, self-confidence is the ability to perceive ourselves, our needs, knowledge and characteristics. Closely linked to this is self-confidence, i.e. deep trust in one’s own abilities. Self-confident people do not constantly question their actions due to uncertainties and can therefore deal with conflicts and problematic situations much more easily. Why you should build it is simply answered. But however, it is often not that easy. Because this includes breaking up familiar structures, behaviors and thought patterns and meeting yourself with more acceptance and self-love. Do not expect too much in too little time.
QUALITY BEFORE QUANTITY: WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW
In 2015, a study in the journal Psychology and Aging showed that friendship circles tend to shrink with age. This is due to changing lifestyles and demographic developments. Over time, however, quality becomes more important than quantity.
Happiness in middle age can be predicted by two things: the quantity of friends in your 20s and the quality of friendships in your 30s. In a way, your 50-year-old self will benefit from both endless bouts of partying in adolescence and long chats with close friends a decade later.
With the rise of anxiety and depression among young adults, which has been dubbed the “epidemic,” a small circle of close friends is far more helpful than a large circle of acquaintances.
Few social contacts: a sign of independence
A small social circle can also be an indicator that you’ve taken steps to separate yourself from people who don’t treat you well; and that you are strong and independent enough to do that.
The wrong friends can damage your mental health, alter your self-image, and prevent you from fulfilling your potential. You may miss the people who used to be a central part of your friend group, but the mental health struggle is pushing you to let go.
You can be an introvert and have different types of relationships
Less socializing doesn’t necessarily mean you’re an introvert. Some introverts also move in large social circles. However, if you have a small circle of friends, are uncomfortable with large social gatherings, and tend to stay home to regroup, then you’re probably an introvert (and that’s okay).
WHAT IS NORMAL ?
It’s normal to have a small inner circle of friends. Some relationships are not worth the time and effort, it is better to do without them. It is not an advantage to have 100 acquaintances but no close friends. Because who are you going to call when you need help? Of course family comes first. But one does not cross out the other. Friends are like, as we say, the family we chose. So better make a wise choice and build something that will last and you can rely on. But you should offer the same to your friends. Because there is no healthy one way relationship or friendship.